04 December 2005

totesumbrellas december mixtape

DECEMBER...a glorious time when all your favorite mp3 blogs are littered with Christmas music and lists of the top albums/bands of the year. First of all, what's up with all the Christmas songs? Can we get some Hannukah and Kwanzaa love up in here? Or how about someone writes some music for Christmukkah or Chrismahkwanzaakah? Speaking of Chrismahkwanzaakah...has anyone else seen the commercials for some phone service that are offensive as all hell...with the gay elf and the Buddhist? They make me more uncomfortable than I'd be if I walked in on my momma and Santa boning. And the top album/band lists?...TOTESUMBRELLAS DON'T PLAY THAT SHIT.

But enough chatter...I made this mix with the entire span of December in mind. I also made it somewhat Wesleyan-centric and Christmas-centric (sorry again, Jews and others). I'd let it speak for itself, but I feel like I need to explain this time.
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  1. PANTS YELL!- New # 4: Ok, so it's right before finals. You have a whole shitload to do. The holiday season is approaching and you dread your holiday shopping, and don't really know when you'll ever get it done. Damn Christmas songs full of bells are all over the radio. Bah Humbug.
  2. CUFF THE DUKE- Ballad of a Lonely Construction Worker: As you're walking on campus, you notice the construction workers out in the cold weather. You complain about the weather, but forget those who are out in the cold all day so you (or people several class years below you) can have a brighter tomorrow. For once, listen to that construction worker's lonely song. How sad.
  3. MY PROJECT BLUE- Control of Me: You're up late writing a paper. You start browsing facebook, procrastinating...checking totesumbrellas ::thumbs up, cheesey grin:: Then you look out the window. You start dreaming of a special someone in your life or happy times. Dazed out.
  4. NELLIE McKAY- Cupcake (live): I'll admit that I really just picked this one because I think Nellie is great December music. Nelly is made for July. However, it is dedicated to Jim McGreevey. Imagine that you mentioned him in a paper for the Government or American Studies class you're probably not taking. What Evs.
  5. LEEROY STAGGER- Just in Case: You're taking part in a holiday gift exchange. You told a friend what you were getting your assigned person. They told said person even though you specifically told them not to. Then they also got high and told everyone that they read in your journal that you had an eating disorder. Then you realized you were just watching an episode of Degrassi (old skool). Bitch please.
  6. ASHLEE SIMPSON f/ MISSY ELLIOTT- L.O.V.E. remix: It's the last day of classes...reading week is officially here and you're going to go out with your gurlz and have a hott time. You're going to get so crunk that you'll even dance to this song. Get down.
  7. CANSEI DE SER SEXY- J. Lo (Missy and YYY remix): It's still reading week. You're still having fun. You hear "Jenny from the Block" at a party. Suddenly, you wish you were J. Lo. She doesn't have to take exams...and she's really been on Oprah. You wish.
  8. ESL- Side By Side: You just slept through your exam. You're kind of sad now. You listen to a song that sounds sad but really has nothing to do with your situation. Oh shit.
  9. JOSE GONZALEZ- Heartbeats: You were sad, but then the sweet acoustic sounds of Jose soothed your troubled soul...now you feel a little better especially since the professor is letting you take the exam tomorrow. Yay Jose.
  10. THE PIPETTES- It Hurts to See You Dance So Well: YES!!! It's done. EVERYTHING. Now you can go home. Go there.
  11. THE WAITRESSES- Christmas Wrapping: On the ride home, this song comes on. Feeling a little better about life, the song actually doesn't sound that bad. You blast it on your radio and sing along to the refrain. You would put your windows down and stick your head out of the window, except you'd freeze. So cold.
  12. JAMES BROWN- Santa Claus, Go Straight to the Ghetto: James Brown requires no explanation on any mix CD.
  13. OH NO! OH MY!- Walk in the Park: This song just defines December. It's filled with "bah-dah-bah-bah"s that are reminiscent of those "tra la las" in Christmas songs you hate though tinted with seemingly sarcastic happiness. It includes a line "Please don't ask me all those questions I don't know" which is so perfect for finals time. Then there's a twist at the end. It highlights all the ups and downs of December.
  14. THE GO TEAM!- We Listen Everyday: Bring in the new year.
SO...that concludes the december mixtape.

BUT...before you go off to your busy Decembers, let me leave you with another gift.

THE DARKNESS- Knockers
(for the sake of Jesse)

Random girl lip-synching Pavement's "Elevate Me Later" on video next to a highway.
Hilarious moments.
(for the sake of hipsters)
I love how she pops back into the frame after the first verse. It makes me laugh every time. Definitely worth watching even if you don't like Pavement or ::gasp:: don't know who they are.

It's not funny like ha ha,
Joe John

2 comments:

guava said...

oh jah. i am feeling the Go!team so much this year.

and that track feat. missy elliott is hot minus ashley simpson. anyway, excellent pickings mister.

december rules!

Katey said...

Remember how I was like "I want everyone I know to send me 5 songs they really like"? You just did it times 3! Yay for that Degrassi song and the Go! Team song I hadn't heard before.