19 December 2005

honorable mention pt 1...

part two
THE TOP TEN BEST BAD MOVIES I HAVE EVER SEEN
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These movies didn't quite make my personal list, but I figured they deserved an honorable mention. It's funny...because everything mentioned so far involves BOOBS. Boobs are funny.

Ski Trippin' (website):


Featuring the comic stylings of Poochman, Tommy "2 Smoov", and Eddie Hustle. This movie would have been higher on the list, except for one small thing-- it's impossible to watch. This movie is low budget. The sound is terrible, causing you to have to sit in front of your television with your ear against the speakers. I seriously think the filmmakers rented out a hotel and recorded with their mother's digital video camera. The other thing is...the title implies that snow will be involved. It is not. The movie fully acknowledges this in one scene. The story is told by a narrator on a park bench. He is telling it to "random white dude". At some point, random white dude says, "Wait guys...if this is ski trip, why isn't there any skiing?" There is a minute of laughter until finally the narrator states, "There ain't no skiin' on ski trip!!!" And he's right. There is no skiing. "Ski trip" is another word for bachelor party circle jerk material apparently. One of the scenes is a wet t-shirt contest where a guy has some "hoes" get all wet under a shower head and then gropes their crotches to make sure they're all wet...um...down there. Then these girls grind together topless. This scene is sure to go down in film history.

Rating: zero ironic enjoyment

Who Let the Hogs Out?,
Joe John

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